The Walking, Talking Skeleton
by Silver Renegade Blaze
Summary: A Skulduggery Pleasant Fanfic! Sorry if its bad O/O
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

 **I really like the Skulduggery Pleasant books, so I decided to write a FanFiction!  
I realised almost no-one had added Gordon the Dragon (from book nine) into their FanFiction, so I decided to use his character. Also, I like dragons.  
Enjoy!**

Valkyrie picked up her phone and called Skulduggery. He picked up almost immediately.  
"Hello?"  
"Hi, Skulduggery. It's me."  
"Why are you phoning?"  
"I'm really bored."  
Skulduggery hesitated. "Actually, so am I. There is nothing interesting going on with the Sanctuary at all."  
He could almost see Valkyrie's grin through the phone. "You have an idea, don't you?"  
"Oh yes," she said.  
"It's going to get us killed, isn't it?"  
"Probably."  
He sighed. "Well, there's not anything else we can do, so... alright then. Where should I meet you?"  
"Outside Gordon's. Half an hour. See you there." She hung up.

~#~

Valkyrie had sold Gordon's mansion to a middle-aged sorcerer. He was rather stupid, which had allowed her to take the key to Gordon's caves without him noticing, as well as a pair of the house keys.  
Skulduggery groaned. "Aww. I was hoping we'd get to break in."  
Valkyrie laughed as she entered the house. She had watched him leave when she was waiting for Skulduggery to arrive. She assumed he was at a pub of some sort.

They entered the caves, and Skulduggery began reading the air as Valkyrie used her magic to light their path. Xena, Valkyrie's faithful dog, followed them obediently. Skulduggery noticed Valkyrie was carrying a large carrier bag.  
"What's in there?"  
Valkyrie smiled. "Food for the dragon."

Skulduggery tilted his head. "So we're paying a visit to Gordon, are we?"  
"The dragon," corrected Valkyrie, her head lowering a little.  
"Oh. Sorry."  
"It doesn't matter."  
Xena walked slightly closer to Valkyrie, sensing her mood.  
"He was a good man, your uncle," said Skulduggery, trying to lighten the mood a little.  
"You said that the first time we met. After his funeral, in his study."  
"Did I?"  
"Yes." Valkyrie smiled . "You looked really peculiar in your disguise."  
Skulduggery chuckled to himself. "Well, it wasn't my _best_ look."

They chatted about their past as partners, deliberately avoiding the subject of Lord Vile and Darquesse, until they reached the pit. It looked as bottomless as they remembered it. The 'vines' that turned out to be that tentacle thing was still hanging there, a few of them dismembered and damaged.  
Skulduggery had humour in his voice. "Well, you obviously put quite a fight back then," he said. "Even without any training or magic."  
She laughed a little as Skulduggery wrapped an arm around her waist and flew them off of the ledge.  
Valkyrie called to Xena. "You stay here. We'll come back up in a little while-maybe riding a dragon." Xena tilted her head a little to show she understood, and sat obediently.

As they descended into the pitch black, Valkyrie remembered what it felt like to be falling. If Skulduggery hadn't caught her, she'd be dead. Or maybe _still_ falling, if it really was bottomless. She wondered what would happen if he dropped her. She tried to shake away those thoughts, but they lingered like a bad smell.  
"Are you okay?" asked Skulduggery, his voice gentle and reassuring. She nodded and they continued.

Eventually, the light from Valkyrie's hand began to illuminate a shape in the gloom. A low rumble shook Valkyrie's bones. She made the light coming from her hand brighter. A small ledge jutted from the sheer wall of the pit, on which sat a strange, slightly underweight figure. It had delicate wings and scales that shone a little in the light, and piercing yellow eyes.

Gordon the dragon peered at the strange figures that stood before him. It took a while for his eyes to adjust to the bright light that came from the girl's hand, but he growled threateningly all the same.  
"Hello, Gordon," said Valkyrie. She noticed the bones scattered around him on the ledge, some obviously belonging to a human, some not.  
Gordon offered up a small hissing sound, like a cat's, but more unearthly. He was sickly thin. His ribcage looked like it was about to burst through his skin and scales.

Valkyrie dug into her carrier bag and threw the starving dragon some meat. Hesitating, he considered eating it.  
"It's alright," reassured Valkyrie. "It's not poisoned or anything."  
Gordon snapped it up, and Valkyrie threw him more. As he shifted to eat it, she noticed a thick iron chain that was clasped tightly around his ankle and connected to the rock face. It was criss-crossed with scratches and bite marks, and was rusted around the edges.

Skulduggery flew her closer towards Gordon. She tried to get close so she could break the chain, but he whirled and snapped angrily.  
"I just want to help you," she said, but Gordon brought out his claws threateningly.  
Skulduggery spoke up. "We have no wish to hurt you," he said in that smooth, velvety voice of his. "We want to set you free."

Gordon seemed to understand a little better. Valkyrie glanced at Skulduggery. Skulduggery shrugged.  
"Older, simpler language. He probably hasn't heard human voices for a long time, and dragons live for a long time, according to myth."

Valkyrie placed her hand on the clasp around Gordon's ankle. Her hand warmed up until it started melting affixed point in the metal. The clasp came off.

Gordon immediately tried to fly, but he was not practised from all his years down in the pit. He landed with a thump and wobbled dangerously on the ledge.  
"Woah. Easy there," said Skulduggery. Gordon regained his balance and stretched out his wings.  
Now Valkyrie could really appreciate the size of Gordon. He towered to about 10 feet, and his wingspan was even wider.

Gordon the dragon flapped his wings a little. They looked rather stiff. Getting annoyed with his own physical weakness, he puffed short breath of fire.  
Valkyrie gasped. "Awesome," she breathed.  
Gordon slowly began to be able to fly again. Skulduggery and Valkyrie stayed a few feet above him as he slowly emerged from the pit. Valkyrie saw Xena's look of surprise as they flew out with a dragon in tow. Valkyrie laughed.

The tentacle vines began to convulse as they felt the breeze from Gordon's beating wings. They tried to grasp at him, but Gordon whirled and suddenly, there was a stream of fire bursting from his mouth. The scorched tentacles retreated quickly.

Gordon landed slightly unsurely next to Xena. Xena looked up at this strange creature for a little while before emitting a small noise that sounded like quiet conversation. Gordon seemed to reply, and soon they were having some sort of conversation.  
"That's so cute!" exclaimed Valkyrie. Skulduggery tilted his head.  
"I'll call the Sanctuary," said Skulduggery. "We'll need transport."  
Valkyrie turned with surprise. "We can take him with us?"  
"Of course we can. I'm not a _complete_ bring-down."

Valkyrie was buzzing with excitement as Skulduggery waited for the new Administrator to answer the phone.  
If he had a face, Skulduggery would be smiling. "Just like when we first met," he mumbled.  
"Hello?" said the Administrator.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Skulduggery and Valkyrie were waiting outside as China arrived in her sleek, black automobile. She stepped out, as elegant as ever. The man who had bought Gordon's estate approached her.  
"They broke into my house! They freed a dragon! A _dragon,_ for God's sake!"  
Skulduggery spoke up. "Technically, we didn't break in. We had a key."  
"And they stole a set of my keys!" The man continued.  
"You don't even know where the dragon came from," said Valkyrie. "We didn't tell you about the caves beneath Gordon's house, and you obviously didn't do your research."  
"They should be locked up! They should be..." he cut his sentence short. He had noticed China's beauty.

China rolled her eyes as he began to grovel. She moved past him and came up to Skulduggery.  
"Of all of the people to prove the existence of dragons, I had a feeling it would be you two."  
Valkyrie grinned. "Actually, it was mainly me."  
Skulduggery stared down at her. "Excuse me. But I think you would be falling to your death if it wasn't for my amazing flying skills."  
"If you teach me how to fly, maybe I wouldn't have needed you to be there."  
"But I haven't taught you how to fly. And if I do, I won't be able to get credit for everything you do anymore."  
China coughed lightly. "Excuse me, but don't we have a dragon to release?"

~#~

It took a week to get Gordon out of the caves. Extensive drilling had to be done to get it through the small cave tunnels, and part of Gordon's mansion had to be collapsed. Saracen was there the whole time, annoying everyone and insisting the dragon's name was Destructorface. Xena stayed with Gordon through the entire process, reassuring him. It was like they were best friends.

Valkyrie stood by and watched as Gordon was loaded onto the trailer. Skulduggery walked up behind her.  
"I feel like a proud mother," she said, as Xena led Gordon into the truck.  
"I can see why," mumbled Skulduggery. Valkyrie looked over and noticed he was playing Angry Birds.  
"Skulduggery! There is a real-life dragon right in front of you, and you decide to play Angry Birds now?!"  
Skulduggery didn't look up. "New update," he muttered.  
Valkyrie perked up. "Really?"  
Skulduggery nodded. "New levels."  
Valkyrie checked her phone. She sighed. "No Wifi or signal," she moaned. "I can't get the update now."

Skulduggery continued playing as Valkyrie put her phone away and watched as Gordon curled up inside the trailer. "I wanna play Angry Birds," she said. Skulduggery laughed.

 **Sorry this chapter is short!**


End file.
